One of my favorite christian women is Beth Moore. She has got the most amazing heart and I love the spirit she carries with her. I've done three of her bible studies and want to do more. I was on the Living Proof Ministries website yesterday and read a letter by Beth and towards the end she said something that has struck a chord with me. She said that all of these years she has not let worldly struggles or success take her eyes of Jesus! She credits prayer, not only from her, but from the millions of others who pray for her and her ministry. It occurs to me that I don't always take that stance with things in my life, but I want to! I want to always keep my eyes on Jesus and not on the temporary situations and circumstances that surround me daily. So many things can cause me to look away. I am reminded once again,just with those few words, that I am a woman after God's heart! No one else but his. I need to get back into the habit of having that love relationship with my Lord. To remember in the midst of hard times and good times that he is my rock, my redeemer, he is my fortress. I have been blessed to have many friends, old & young, who are the face of God to me and I am so thankful that he gives me examples to inspire me to come home and rest awhile!

If I could take just a moment and pour out my heart
I would say to my Lord, My God, How great thou art.
You walk with me by day and safeguard me through the night
always there beside me no matter what the strife.
So from this humble heart, I just wanted to say
I love you Lord! I'll be pursuing YOU today.

A Shakesperean Adventure

Our son Matthew is quite the talent on stage and tonight we attended a dinner theater put on by the drama club. It is the school's One Act. This year they did Macbeth. I am always amazed when I see Matthew perform because living from day to day sometimes I forget his talent. After the show Mark asked me, out of the blue, what brings me joy. It took me a couple of minutes to answer and my response was, watching my children succeed and live out some of their dreams. I know that our ultimate joy comes from God and that he is our reason to rejoice. That being said, there is no greater joy so far in this life than being a mother. Father, I thank you so much that you have entrusted these children to me. I pray that you would be my guide and give me the wisdom needed to complete the task of raising them. What a gift you have given to me.

Well we did it! We finally managed to get family pictures taken. It was a bittersweet family portrait as I find myself wondering if it will ever look the same. Our lives are changing so very quickly. We are once again experiencing firsts with our children. This was the first Christmas we decorated our tree without Kristina. It was a hard day for me I admit! It didn't seem complete but I realize that we are on another part of our journey with Kristina. Being there for here as she discovers the pressures that come with being an adult and having to support yourself. I also think toward the future and know that next year will be very different as well. I'm not sure where we will be living but I do know that we will be on a military base somewhere and my heart is happy with that. There is a kinship among the families that serve in the armed forces that can not fully be explained. I'm not sure if Mark will be with us next Christmas or if he will find himself in the desert but one thing I am assured of is that God is with us no matter where we go. So this Christmas as we live out transition and say good-bye to the things we have known I thank God that he always has us in his care and that he always surrounds us with people to love and who love us in return. Thank you Father for your constant love and care.

Last night just before bed I found my heart a little troubled (who am I kidding) a lot troubled, I brushed my teeth grabbed my bible and said goodnight to my family. I needed a few minutes alone with my God. I needed to hear from him and to be reassured (once again) of his presence in my life. To my delight I found myself in Isaiah 41:9b-10 I have chosen you and have not rejected you. So do not fear, for I am with you; I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. We have so many questions about what our very near future will hold and I find myself in pit of worry and fear. God is so good to remind me that he is my strength and that he has not left me he is right here guiding me and loving me. It is so easy to slip into a pit of worry and fear because we are so often surrounded by the worlds standards. But take heart, God is just a breath away and he is longing for you to grab your bible and come slip away with him for just a little while so that he can rebuild, reassure and strengthen you for the time ahead. In his grace.